Photo By Susan A Romano | Footprints of a family of three are captured for posterity.... read more read more
PATRICK AIR FORCE BASE, Fla. – Her name is Savannah Joy. Her date of birth and date of death are expected to be one and the same – Oct. 7, 2013. Despite such awareness of their baby’s own mortality, her parents are celebrating – at least, they are during Savannah’s first nine months of ‘life.’
Meet Senior Airman Joshua Hurtley and his wife, Rebecca. On Jan. 26, 2013, the young couple learned they were expecting their first child. Like many expectant parents, their attention turned to exciting things such as choosing names, setting up a nursery, picking out baby furniture and dreaming about the future. They shared their excitement with family and friends, and began what they thought would be a routine, wondrous, anxious, and happy journey into the world of parenthood.
Their celebration continued on April 5 when they found out their child was going to be a girl. From that moment on, she was no longer ‘the baby’ in their eyes; she would be known as Savannah, after the quaint Georgia town where the newlyweds had spent a memorable vacation.
But their dreams were shattered on May 13 when their obstetrician called to say Rebecca’s blood work had come back indicating the baby had a neural tube defect (NTD). To say the couple was stunned and speechless would be a gross understatement. A flurry of bewildering questions and unimaginable heartache set in.
They wanted a second opinion. They wanted this first diagnosis to be a mistake. They wanted all their hopes and dreams to come true for their precious newborn. But that was not to be. Further tests confirmed what their obstetrician had said: their baby had anencephaly.
Anencephaly is a congenital defect that causes a fetus to develop without a forebrain, cerebellum or cranium, and in nearly 100 percent of cases, it is fatal. One in every 5,000 births is affected by the disorder, and if the infant is not stillborn, he or she will die within a few hours or days after delivery.
So, where does one turn to for help in coping with a situation like this? For Air Force members, their choices are many. From seeking help from the base chaplain to speaking with a mental health counselor, airmen are afforded several options to guide them through tragedy and assist them with finding sources of strength. In the Hurtleys’ case, they relied on their faith.
“We were in total shock when we got the news,” said Josh, who works at the Air Force Technical Applications Center at Patrick AFB, Fla., as a standards and evaluations technician. “We wanted the doctor to be wrong. We didn’t understand how we could be a part of the fraction of one percent of families who experience this. All we knew was that we wanted to meet our little girl.”
They consulted their parents. They met with their pastor. They did research online. They decided to meet with another doctor to see if there was any hope for a better prognosis. Unfortunately, the news they received from the second physician was identical to the first.
Yet despite the diagnosis of the second opinion being exactly the same as the first, the husband and wife took it as a blessing.
“The whole meeting with the second obstetrician was a wonderful, therapeutic experience that we will never forget,” said Rebecca, who, in addition to being an expectant mother, is also a nanny to two young boys. “It was at that moment that despite our devastation, we started to focus on what Savannah had, rather than what she didn’t have. God has given her life, and it is our job as parents to help her live it.”
Upon meeting Josh and Rebecca, it doesn’t take long to realize the couple’s faith is the cornerstone of their relationship. It stands to reason, since they first met in high school through their church’s youth group in Marco Island, Fla. They dated for three years, and were married on April 18, 2009.
And so began their spiritual journey together.
With the exception of the grim diagnosis, Rebecca is like any other expectant mother, experiencing the typical and not-so-typical symptoms that accompany a pregnancy.
“In every other sense, Savannah and this pregnancy are normal,” Rebecca said. “Fifty straight days of morning sickness? Check. Midnight food runs? Check. Irrational fear when I haven’t felt her kick in the last five minutes? Double check! I’m fortunate because I am experiencing all the ‘regular’ rites of passage during motherhood – swollen feet, odd cravings, fatigue, and even stretch marks.”
From a medical standpoint, the decision to continue with or terminate an anencephalic pregnancy is an extremely personal one.
“The decision of what to do in the case of an anencephaly diagnosis can be heart wrenching,” said Dr. Arthur Townsend IV, an obstetrics and gynecology specialist. “Many parents opt to terminate the pregnancy with the knowledge that there is zero chance the baby will survive. Choosing to end the pregnancy can help some parents move forward and begin the grieving process.
Other parents, however, may have strict religious or other personal beliefs against abortion, and they may choose to carry the pregnancy to term, even with the full knowledge that the baby will not live more than a few days or weeks at most.”
Full knowledge aside, Josh and Rebecca, set out to capture Savannah’s life, all while gently and safely tucked inside Rebecca’s womb. They built ‘The List’ – a compilation of things that were important to them for their little girl to experience. In their words, “it is an ambitious goal of 100 separate memories we’d like to make together. One might think of it as little Savannah Joy’s bucket list!”
From the list grew their blog, which initially was to be a therapeutic outlet to share their story, but through it they developed significant bonds of friendship with other parents who were going through a similar experience. It also serves as a record for Josh and Rebecca to go back to and relive each memory they’ve made with Savannah.
And what memories they’ve made! From attending a baseball game to building a sand castle to going on a daddy-daughter date, each event was carefully selected, captured in photos, and joyfully written about on their blog.
“Before we found out about Savannah’s diagnosis, I allowed myself to dream about all the things a mommy wants to experience with her little girl – watching her take her first steps, going to her first dance recital, and especially those precious mommy-daughter days,” said Rebecca. “But the NTD put all of those aspirations on hold. We quickly replaced those dreams with small celebrations and experiences and took photos just like any other parent does when their child meets Mickey Mouse or goes to the beach or visits the zoo for the first time. I will forever cherish all the great memories we have made together as a family of three.”
For this military family to face such an enormous hurdle so early in life makes one wonder how they are coping with the ‘finality’ of Rebecca’s delivery day.
“A lot of people will ask me, ‘How on earth to you prepare for something like that?’ and all I can honestly say is we still aren’t sure,” said Josh. “What we are sure of, though, is that we have put our faith in God and we trust Him completely. He’s taken us this far, and we know that He’ll never leave us nor forsake us. And my Air Force family has been absolutely amazing as well. They’ve been so understanding with all the appointments we’ve had, and their thoughts and prayers have been enormous and uplifting. Even people who aren’t even in my chain of command or from my directorate have made a point to ask how we’ve been doing, and ask if there’s anything we need. It’s been an incredible outpouring of support.”
Another source of support comes from being attendees of the Church at Viera. On many occasions, Josh and Rebecca have relied on the counsel and wisdom of the church’s associate pastor, Brandon Rieb.
“Josh and Rebecca have been an incredible inspiration to me and many others,” said Rieb. “Their story is also one of tremendous fortitude. As crazy as this sounds, as I have watched them throughout this journey, my feelings of initial sadness quickly morphed into feelings of joy and hope for the Hurtleys. Little Savannah’s illness was not a surprise to God. Psalms 139:16 states, ‘God’s eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in His book.’ Although it is difficult now, I believe that God is only just beginning to write their amazing story of parenthood.”
Maj. Scott Brandimore, Josh’s division chief, has been witness to what the Hurtleys have been through since January, and has been amazed at their resilience.
“Their story is one of complete and total inspiration,” said Brandimore. “I know there are people out there who might question their decision to go through the full nine months with little hope for a positive outcome, but once you meet them, their hope and their courage are infectious. It reminds me of what poet and playwright Vaclav Havel once said: ‘Hope is not the expectation that things will turn out well, but the conviction that something is worth working for, however it turns out.’ It’s like Havel wrote that with Josh and Rebecca in mind.”
When asked what people can do to help them through this chapter of their lives, Josh smiled and said, “First and foremost, we ask for prayers. We are trusting in God for a miracle, whether that is a physical healing or even just the gift of time with Savannah. If someone feels the need to do more, any act of kindness or thoughtfulness would be much appreciated.”
| Date Taken: | 09.05.2013 |
| Date Posted: | 09.06.2013 09:12 |
| Story ID: | 113201 |
| Location: | MARCO ISLAND, FLORIDA, FLORIDA, US |
| Web Views: | 448 |
| Downloads: | 0 |
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