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FORT BRAGG, N.C. - “We call it hell week. My son’s birthday is Oct. 10, his wedding was set for Oct. 12 a year following his deployment, and his fiancée’s birthday is Oct. 15,” said Candis Martin, Army Reserve Ambassador and Gold Star Program advocate. “Tom’s goal was to get his men home safe, and he kept that promise. All of them came back… except him.”
Her son, 1st Lt. Tom Martin, an armored cavalry officer assigned to the 4th Brigade Combat Team (Airborne), 25th Infantry Division, was killed Oct. 14, 2007, when insurgents attacked his platoon with small arms fire in Al Busayifi, Iraq, just four days after his 27th birthday.
Though news of his death was hard to fathom, she understood first-hand the risks of military service.
Martin served 38 years in the Army Reserve, initially as a part-time personnel administrative clerk and eventually retiring as a full-time chief warrant officer five. She had, in fact, just returned from a yearlong deployment to Iraq in July 2006 – a little more than a year before her son’s death.
However, like most mothers, that “dreadful knock at the door” was unexpected.
“I had just chatted with Tom on instant messenger the day before,” she said. “He was going out on a mission that night. It would have been his 292nd mission and he had come back from every one of them. I really believed that he was coming home.”
This was her son’s second to the last mission before he was to redeploy and he wasn’t about to slack up, Martin said.
It was this example of selfless leadership, dedication and devotion to his men that she vows never to forget, especially during Memorial Day.
“To this day, we continue to hear stories of how lives have been changed because of his leadership,” she said. “He motivated his Soldiers and he’s still making a difference.”
Today, Martin actively advocates for Gold Star Families and speaks wherever possible to educate the public on what the pin represents and to inform the families of the support services available to them.
“The Gold Star Lapel pin represents the ultimate sacrifice,” she said. “I wear the Gold Star pin to remember my son who would give his life.”
“Once a Soldier is no longer living, that doesn’t mean that the Soldier is no longer part of the Army Reserve family,” she said. The Gold Star program ensures that.
In addition to the services provided, sometimes, the survivors just want to be heard and to share stories of their loved ones, Martin said.
“It’s okay to talk about that elephant in the room,” she said. “It’s okay to mention the names of those fallen sons, daughters, husbands and wives, because if we don’t hear those names, it’s like their life didn’t have purpose and they clearly did. As long as someone continues to mention their name and mention the fact that they even lived and died for a reason, then their life was all
worth it.”
The Survivor Outreach Services program is spearheading the initiative to raise awareness of what wearing a Gold Star pin means and the importance of being prepared,” said Barbara Giddens, Army Reserve Family Program Liaison and SOS program manager.
The programs and services are provided to survivors regardless of the fallen member’s duty status or component as long as the family desires, Giddens said.
For more information about Gold Star pins, visit www.goldstarpins.org or your nearest Army Reserve SOS office.
| Date Taken: | 04.15.2014 |
| Date Posted: | 04.15.2014 09:24 |
| Story ID: | 125965 |
| Location: | FORT BRAGG, NORTH CAROLINA, US |
| Web Views: | 175 |
| Downloads: | 1 |
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