FORT POLK, La. — Military spouses face challenges. These home-based warriors carry on when their significant other is in the field or deployed for long months at a time. They strive to be as strong as their Soldiers while bearing the burdens of parenting, budgets, automobile repairs, plumbing problems and more so their partner downrange doesn’t have to worry about what’s happening at home and can focus on the mission. It takes a toll, one that sometimes isn’t recognized, even by the spouses themselves.
Amy Uptgraft, a veteran Army spouse, was one of those women. After a fifth deployment, as she juggled a home and children, she said she bore resentment, anger and frustration which led to guilt for having those feelings.
“It was like a hamster wheel of deployment. He was home and then gone again. It felt like we could never get off the wheel,” said Uptgraft. “I would ask myself, ‘when is this going to stop?’ The answer is no one knows.”
She realized she needed help to sort through her emotions and sought the aid of a therapist. As part of her healing process, she was told to keep a journal. With a degree from Purdue University with a Bachelor of Arts in theater performance, Uptgraft took what she wrote and decided to transform it into a play.
“The play became my therapy. It absolutely healed me,” she said.
Uptgraft interviewed spouses from every conflict since World War II and created a play, with the help of Gregory Stieber, a theatrical director, producer and actor.
“We took elements from those stories, put a band in place and once we added an audience I think we knew we had something really special,” she said. “I want to think we did these spouses justice in sharing their stories.”
Uptgraft said she hoped the play would help other spouses who were dealing with the same challenges and issues she had struggled to overcome.
“Sometimes you just need to be able to say, ‘This is hard.’ I want spouses to feel like their stories are being heard. While we are smiling, wearing our shiny American flag pins, many of us are cracking from the inside out,” she said.
The play and Uptgraft’s connections to other spouses grew into a grassroots organization called The Veteran’s Spouse Project (VSP) — a nonprofit organization that tells the stories of military spouses across generations through theater and expressive arts. VSP programs offer participants the opportunity to share, create, listen and connect. The project exists to help bridge the civilian and military gaps within communities by deepening the understanding of what military families endure.
The project has a five-person staff of military spouses.
They all met while stationed in Joint Base Elmendorf-Richardson, Alaska where they banded together to produce the play and creative workshops. VSP premeried "I Will Wait" and the “Made For You” workshops in May of 2018.
The staff is:
• Amy Uptgraft — artistic director and founder of The Veteran’s Spouse Project/playwright
• Wendy Caldwell — expressive arts director
• Lea Johnson — managing director
• Angela Caruso — marketing director
• Kristie Rigdon — accountant
Caldwell said it’s a special experience to be a military spouse, but many feel isolated.
“We might feel like we don’t want to say anything about what we are going through. I think this project brings front and center the fact that we need to support each other,” she said. “It’s OK to have negative feelings about a deployment or the challenges of being a military spouse.
Johnson said they wanted to see what happened if they showed a play and then went into an expressive arts experience to help manage stress and deal with the emotions from whatever hardships they have experienced.
“It was incredible to see these women discover their strengths that they had perhaps never acknowledged to themselves. I loved watching them share that experience together in the workshops, but it was the reading of the play that really opened them up as military spouses,” she said. “The play is true and raw and can be hard to watch, but the workshops help deal with the emotions it evokes in a healthy way.”
Johnson said the feedback they got was incredible.
“Spouses thanked us for saying the things that they never felt they could and the civilians said they were blown away because it brought to light issues they had never thought about,” she said.
Johnson said it was also interesting to see the reaction of the Soldiers watching the reading. She said the reading brings to light the reality of what their spouses endure and gives them a totally different perspective.
“One brigade commander told me he’s never allowed himself to think about what it actually means to wait,” she said. “He was looking at his wife at the time and I thought how powerful and what restoration that must have brought to their relationship.”
Once their husbands redeployed, Johnson said the permanent change of station season hit and the project members were scattered across the United States.
“We have managed to keep the project going. We now have a project team member still at Alaska, one in Maryland, Tennessee, Louisiana and Michigan. We are still incorporated in Alaska, but we don’t really have a home office,” said Johnson.
After her Family settled at Fort Polk, Johnson said she realized she wanted to bring the Veteran’s Spouse Project here because she felt the spouses could use it, but also because she realized the people in the surrounding area have tender hearts for the military community.
“They are so supportive on and off post,” she said.
Johnson said she thinks Fort Polk’s Directorate of Family Morale, Welfare and Recreation is knocking it out of the ball park when it comes to providing events and fun things for Soldiers and Families to do.
“It’s more robust than almost anywhere else I’ve been. But how amazing is it for us to be able to come in and organize these workshops to offer another outlet? You have workouts, runs and events, but you don’t have as many opportunities in the artistic sector. It’s exciting for us to add a supportive balance to what is already offered. That’s what we’ve seen at each location we have presented the production. The arts are definitely under represented in the military world,” she said.
Johnson said VSP produced "I Will Wait" and did two more workshops in Columbus, Georgia in May of 2019. By November 2019, she said she knew the next stop for their programs was Fort Polk.
The project hosts, “I Will Wait,” a play by Amy Uptgraft and Gregory Stieber, March 11 at 6:30 p.m. The event will take place at Celebrations, 108 N. Third St., Leesville. The play is one performance only and free to the public. There is a suggested ticket donation of $10 per person.
The reading of “I Will Wait,” tells the story of sending a loved one to war using real life experiences combined with original music. The story begins in 1945 at the end of World War II and ends with spouses caught in the current cycle of war and deployment.
The workshops following the play include “What Anchors You?” (March 13) and “What’s Your Spouse Story?” (March 14).
The workshops were completely filled within 10 days.
“We have always had a waiting list, but we have never filled the workshops up this fast. More than 40 spouses have signed up,” said Johnson.
The workshops were supported by a grant from the Fort Polk Thrift Boutique.
If enough people sign up on the wait list, Johnson said it’s possible they would try to accommodate those people by opening up a third workshop the same weekend as the other two take place.
If you are interested in signing up on the wait list visit www.veteransspouseproject.org, look under events and click on event wait lists.
Johnson said though the workshops are currently full, she would still encourage people to attend the reading.
“Unlike the workshops, we can accommodate as many people as would like to attend,” she said.
Uptgraft, Rigdon, Caldwell and Johnson will attend the Fort Polk presentation and workshops.
“Wendy facilitates the workshops, she is a licensed therapist with additional licensure in Expressive Arts Therapy. Kristie assists her during these workshops and handles the admin during program weekends. Amy directs the reading,” said Johnson.
Johnson said as each member of the project team continues to move on in their military journey that they would love for the project to continue to grow and thrive.
“It would be our dream to leave our footprint in each location that has produced the play and had workshops. That’s a long range goal that we haven’t figured out yet, but we hope will eventually happen,” she said.
Uptgraft said she would love to see “I Will Wait” in other communities across the country and continue to share the story of military spouses.
For more information or to reserve tickets for the play visit www.veteranspouse project.org.
The project continues to gather the stories of military spouses.
If you would like to share your story visit website or email Amy Uptgraft at amyuptgraft@iwillwaitvsp.com.
| Date Taken: | 02.21.2020 |
| Date Posted: | 02.21.2020 14:17 |
| Story ID: | 363634 |
| Location: | FORT POLK, LOUISIANA, US |
| Web Views: | 35 |
| Downloads: | 0 |
This work, Spouse project brings art, empathy to Fort Polk spouses, by Angie Thorne, identified by DVIDS, must comply with the restrictions shown on https://www.dvidshub.net/about/copyright.
