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“I started drinking at 16,” he said recounting his adolescent years in Puerto Rico. “We used to see drinking as a common thing, bars were on every corner with rum and beer everywhere. We didn’t see drinking as a huge deal.”
After many years of heavy drinking later Chief Aviation Maintenance Administrationman Joel Rivera-Flores looked in the mirror and couldn’t recognize the man he had become, for himself and his family.
Something that began as a social behavior became a lifestyle. Rivera said that as a youth he would go out almost every weekend with his friends. He would drink for a “feeling” and stop. He thought he was in control, but in reality, he was using alcohol to run away from himself.
When Rivera came to live in the United States he said he had to make a major cultural adjustment. There were many aspects of American culture he did not understand at the time, including the language. In order to cope with this new situation, Rivera used his most familiar remedy: drinking.
“[My drinking] grew more over the years,” said Rivera. “By the time I took a look at myself, I was already deep in the hole.”
It was in 2015 when Rivera’s drinking became heavier and started affecting his family life. Rivera got back from deployment and had the opportunity to spend quality time with his family, but instead he did the exact opposite.
“I came back but my soul didn’t,” said Rivera. “I pushed my family away: my wife, my brothers and my parents. I kept myself isolated.”
Despite Rivera’s efforts to push his family away they did not give up on him easily. Rivera said that they encouraged him to get the help that he needed. Instead of taking SARP seriously, he only did it to get it done, not to help himself. Rivera said that this was just a short-term bandage that eventually caught up to him.
After many warnings and ultimatums, his wife eventually left the house with their children. Rivera said for a long period of time he did not know where his family was. He said that he had an empty home and an empty heart. Rivera reached a breaking point. His family, career and finances were in bad shape, but that did not stop him until one fateful morning.
“I felt alone and I was in a constant battle with myself and went into a very dark place,” said Rivera. “One day I woke up in the morning with alcohol withdrawals and before I started drinking, I looked at my reflection in the mirror and I couldn’t recognize myself.
After facing himself, Rivera started to pray. He asked God to give him just one more opportunity to overcome his addiction, so he admitted himself again to Substance Abuse Rehabilitation Program on Aug. 8, 2017. Even though they were separated, Rivera’s wife took the time to see him off as he was admitted into the SARP program for the second time.
“I was never readier to work on myself,” said Rivera. He saw the same counselor from his previous SARP visit in a different light. Instead of just making a check in the box, Rivera said that he was overcome with motivation to finally step out of this dark place.
“It felt like a spiritual awakening,” said Rivera. “The motivation I had was driven by something higher than myself.”
Rivera was admitted into Naval Hospital Portsmouth’s SARP’s level three in-patient care program where he lived for 35 days. While enrolled in SARP, Rivera was set up with a schedule. He was told when to eat, sleep and work out. During the routine he had to endure withdrawals, cravings and mood changes.
“Getting rid of the thing buried inside you that makes you drink every time you feel an emotion is the hardest thing to overcome while going through treatment,” said Rivera. However, on top of Alcoholics Anonymous sessions he attended a twelve-step program that incorporated Christianity with the healing process. Rivera attributes his success in the treatment process to his new-found spirituality.
After completing treatment, Rivera said that he made a complete 180-degree change. Now, three years sober, he re-bonded with the same family that he pushed away, rekindled his marriage with his wife, and became a religious leader at church where he is the marriage ministries leader.
However, the one of the outcomes after being sober for three years was his new-found passion: counseling. Rivera has since applied to become a SARP counselor.
“Being a counselor is my way of paying forward what God has done in my life,” said Rivera.
Rivera wants to remind those who are struggling, “At the end of the day, it was about taking that first step to say ‘I am powerless. I cannot control this. This has control over me and that I need to do something about it and that I’m doing the right thing by being here.’”
| Date Taken: | 02.09.2020 |
| Date Posted: | 01.01.2021 00:13 |
| Story ID: | 386363 |
| Location: | ATLANTIC OCEAN |
| Web Views: | 36 |
| Downloads: | 0 |
This work, How A Reflection Turned Into a Life Change, by PO2 Brianna Thompson, identified by DVIDS, must comply with the restrictions shown on https://www.dvidshub.net/about/copyright.
